Hi. This is my story.
I was 15 years old when I fell in love with him. I was just in my last year of school taking my last exams. I fell head over heels for this bad boy. Things progressed very quickly and we soon began a relationship about 2 weeks later. Things were amazing in the beginning, he was so charming, and did anything for me to see me smile (although I was a very impressionable young girl). A month or so passed by and by this point we were quite comfortable with eachother in the relationship. This is when I started to see the real side of him, he started getting angry. Shouting and punching walls when things didn’t go his way or things weren’t great for him. Everybody else would suffer. Sometimes he’d even go as far as punching himself in the head. I was only young and I kind of turned a blind eye to it at the time, but that’s what got me in the mess. I ignored a red flag. Before I knew it I had been with him a year, things were still the same except he wasn’t as charming as he used to be. He never did anything to see me smile anymore, it was all about him. I was constantly shouted at, called stupid, forced to do illegal things that I made clear I didn’t want to do, went to places I shouldn’t have been. I slipped into a very bad time about 2 & a half years Into the relationship as I then developed a cocaine addiction. It took me until an old friend saw me after not seeing them for years, and they told me that my clothes were hanging off me. I had never felt so much shame, embarrassment, disgust and hurt all at one time. I remember that same evening I went home and I looked in the mirror, and for the first time - I saw what they saw. I was blessed enough to have stopped taking cocaine there and then as this was a HUGE reality check for me. I then developed HUGE body issues with myself. My parents begged me to leave him but I always made excuses to defend his actions. There’s way too much to talk about in my story....but one day a light bulb moment happened and I realised I wasn’t happy. It took me 4 months to pluck up some courage to leave him, and 4 months later I did. Albeit, I did see him a few times here and there, unfortunately he roped me back in. It’s called “Trauma bonding” apparently and that continues for another 2/3months. Then finally it ended. Fast forward to last year, (6 years after incident) and I had not realised since the time of the incident I was in a DOMESTIC VIOLENCE relationship. I called the police right away. Don’t be afraid to share your truth. It took me 6 years to realise I’ve been suffering as a result of domestic violence.
Thank you for reading my story