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A mothers heart broken….

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28/08/2014        Anonymous

I am only sharing this so other mothers know they are not alone. I'm not sure where to begin as it's heartbreaking to even remember but my son of 3 was being sexually abused by his father, we were separated and he went to stay with him on weekends. I had a feeling something wasn't right as he would cling to my leg crying that he didn't want to go. He finally told me on Father's Day when he had just came back, he went into details that a child of 3 could never have known. I called the police straight away and they over the next few days took statements and evidence. Then I was told there was no evidence that it was my sons word against his. I was so angry. Social services got involved and said he could go back to his fathers as they saw no harm, I had to fight them and was quoted by one of them that I would be surprised the things kids can make up! I put in a complaint and recieved no apology. It went to court and was there a few times as visitation was suspended but they were thinking of starting it again as there was no evidence. I was called a bad mother in court by his lawyer, I had to sit beside him in court for 20 mins before the judge came in, my heart beating out of my chest with anger, I wanted to leap across that table and rip his heart out the way he had mine! My son has nightmares, wets his bed, and has to see a child physcologist because of this, my relationship with my current partner was put through a horrible time, I would cry down the phone to doctors and social work telling them what my son would tell me and ask them what am I supposed to say to him he's only 3, only to be told call back when he's in bed or don't cry I front of him, except when I would call back and he was in be did get told of for not calling office hours and it wasn't an emergency! The police I could never get in touch with I had to keep calling them constantly. I went to therapy which was terrible it was meant to be frequent but ended up being once every 2 weeks which wasn't helpful in the slightest. I was put on anti depressants...it is the single most horrible thing that could have happened to my child and my heart will always be broken because of it. He was never charged as before the final court case he fled the country back to where he was from. I will never have justice for my child. To any woman out there reading this you have to just keep fighting for your child, they can't do it for themselves but the way we were made to feel and were treated was terrible, there was no support. If my son was awarded compensation I'd love to take him to Disneyland and give him some happy memories for his childhood rather than the awful ones that keep him awake now.